Tag Archives: Forgotten

Plant Obituary – Herschel


Herschel ? – 01/16/13

Herschel, a tomato of some sort, was found dead in the basement of Jeff’s new house on top of an old broken dryer. Though Jeff knows little about the life of Herschel he assumes he would have enjoyed the basement at first because it had plenty of spiders and other unwelcomed wildlife to keep him company through the damp, cold days. Despite the horrible dampness in the basement, Herschel eventually dried to the point of no return.

Jeff, a construction worker, is sad that he didn’t get to know Herschel before his death because he really likes tomatoes. A lot.

Herschel will be buried in Jeff’s compost pile and used to fertilize his future tomato plants.


Plant Obituary – Xavier


Xavier 05/03/2012 - 12/11/2012

Xavier 05/03/2012 – 12/11/2012

Xavier, a colorful Croton, received severe frostbite after being left outside too late into the season and apparently continues to be out there. Xavier will continue to sit in the yard in his frozen state indefinitely. Jackie, a nun wrangler by trade, is devastated by the news.

Xavier was a loyal and loving plant. His favorite pastimes were playing fetch, sniffing other plants’ pots and “marking his territory” in the backyard. Jackie let him out to do his business in the yard sometime back in September and forgot to retrieve him. It wasn’t until mid-December that Jackie realized her error. Poor Xavier was a goner. Jackie’s heart aches but she is thankful that Xavier taught her an important lesson: never trust Jackie with a dog.

Plant Obituary – Fred

Fred 06/2006 - ?

Fred 06/2006 – ?

Fred, a red dragon palm died quietly after being forgotten behind some books on an office shelf. Jim, a mechanic, feels alright about it because he didn’t even want Fred in the first place and will be dumping him behind the shop after lunch.

Fred enjoyed reading safety manuals and collecting dust. Luckily his memory will live on in the magical world of the internets.